Nighat Jobeen
Nighat talks about women in her culture

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My daughters at the moment are, like I said, twelve and ten. They do go to parties – friends’ parties. They’re not restricted, but I think if I wanted to restrict them I could have done that because every parent has their own belief and their own way of doing things. So there they are, ten and twelve. They do go to parties, they do wear Western clothes but they also know what their religion is and, at present, they are studying their religion.

So I have the best of both worlds really. I have my culture, my religion, at the same time I’m a working Mum, which is beneficial to my children - I know what a working environment is. I wouldn’t stop my children from going to college because I’ve been to college and it hasn’t done any harm to me so - you know?

So I have the best of both worlds really. I have my culture, my religion, at the same time I’m a working Mum, which is beneficial to my children - I know what a working environment is. I wouldn’t stop my children from going to college because I’ve been to college and it hasn’t done any harm to me so - you know?

In fact the ladies lead a very social life, you’ll be surprised to know. On a Friday we go - everybody gathers in The Mosque to pray. Weekends the children go to Urdu school so that’s where all the children meet. In the evenings they have Islamic Studies, that’s where they meet. And, apart from that, we have a very open house policy. You don’t make an appointment to go round somebody’s house. You just go and people expect that. That’s one thing I’ve found very strange when I was nursing, is when people used to say to you, ‘My daughter’s coming round next weekend.’ Or the daughter used to phone up to their mums and say, ‘Can we come and visit you?’ I used to find that very strange. It’s not like that with Asian communities. It’s an open door policy. You go, you visit. If you arrive there at lunch time you have lunch. If you arrive at tea time you have tea, you know?